Top 10 Do's & Don'ts for relationships

So you want to know how to not screw things up.......This is a great list to remember when trying to navigate the sometimes turbulent waters of dating. These can be applicable to both ladies and gentlemen.  Pretty easy and straight forward, but great reminders of what it takes have a successful relationship. 

10. Never be offended by the truth, especially when you ask for it.

When you ask for honesty, you are asking for information that may be potentially hurtful. Though it may be upsetting, you wanted honesty. Many times, people won’t actually be honest to spare feelings, but usually this ends up hurting someone more in the end. So respect honesty when you ask for it, even if it may be upsetting.

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Why do couples fight more when they drink...?

Dear theRubber,

I can’t seem to figure this out. Me and my girlfriend have a great relationship, but when we drink there is always a fight. I don’t want to fight and she says she doesn’t either. We always make up in the morning. Why does this happen? Is there a way to stop this from happeing?

Ohhhh my friend…. This is an age old question. In medieval times knights and their princess would retire to watering holes as happy couples and end up sleeping in different ends of the castle. Cowboys and their escorts would fight after a few shots of whiskey and end up in some domestic shootout. And after a few drinks my parents would argue and not speak until the next day.  (I'M FINE SERIOUSLY.....NO, I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!!)
So, people have been asking this question for many years.

So here is our take on it.

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"Can I Maintain My Long Distance Relationship When I Go To College?"

(If you look close enough, you can see internet porn on the side screen...it's a joke - go to youporn.com perv)

Today’s question comes from an incoming freshman. She is wondering how hard it will be for her to manage her long term relationship when it turns into a long distance relationship.

"Hey theRubberU,

Love the stories, but I have a question. I was reading your story “Top 5 things to leave at home when you come to college,” and number 1 was my your bf/gf. Is this really serious? Are things going to get that bad? He is only going to college 2 hours away and we have been dating for 2 years.  Is it going to be really hard to keep my relationship with him?"

Well writer, let me start by saying that no matter what I say here you are not going to take my advice. I can tell you exactly how this relationship will play out, and you will not listen. But, I feel confident that mid way through the semester;when you have the WVU starting linebacker taking body shots off you and you are fist pumping your heart away at Cellar, you will think back to this article and say….. “Yea, theRubberU was right” (LET’S GOOOOO …. Mountaineers)

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What is it about having sex with someone new that men find so appealing?

Our first question came from a girl who just got out of a serious relationship because there were clues of cheating. This answer is directed to a the female gender. If you have other questions or comments post below. 

Questions 1: “What is it about having sex with someone new that men find so appealing? Is it just the conquest?Why do they want to be with someone new?

(Disclaimer: We know not every guy is like this and your boyfriend doesn't think these things......Fine, we don't care. This is for everyone else then. )

Answer: 

Let me start off by saying that women are guilty of the same actions as men. Men tend to get blamed more for these things, but women can be just a promiscuous. 

For the most part its not about "conquest" like it is some big prize. If it is a new or random hookup, it's exactly that - New and Interesting. Fun and lighthearted, with no expectations except for maybe some cab money and a T-shirt to borrow for the walk of shame. (there is a small percentage of guys that are “ Prize Hunters” or “Number Scorers” that do it strictly for the stats and the thrill of the hunt)

The best way to explain it is that most guys have some form of sexual ADD (no it’s not an STD). It's the fact that no matter how great the person you want to be with is, how much you care, and how long you've been together - there comes a point where curiosity creeps in and you wonder what your missing. Curiosity then turns to flirtation and so on..........

At that point, the honeymoon period has been over for a while and the blinders come off.  We start noticing new females and opportunities. Next thing you know your boyfriends phone is going off at 5am - with a "Hey" text saved under a general guys name. Like "Tim". 

As the saying goes, “show me the hottest girl in the world and I will show you a guy tired of F’in her……” and if you haven’t heard that before now, now you know. It's a saying for a reason. At that point someone has to decide if the relationship is worth it and if they are willing to work at it.

Usually, one of three things happened. 1) Some guys get tired of dealing with the other person - they literally can't deal with it anymore. Arguing, little fights, shitty texts, flirting, etc..... it all takes its toll on a relationship ship (same for you guys).

2) Some guys need to know that they can still get female attention - like a justification of our manhood. Women, you love attention and to be complimented, and we do too. Especially some new female saying nice things about you or blatantly hitting on you.

3) Some, just don't care that about the relationship. They are over it, but just haven't told you yet...which is a different article all together.
(This all applies to ladies too. Ive heard my female friends talk about guys. Stuff a guy should never hear about another man)

In addition, age plays a huge role. The younger a guy is, the tougher it is to manage this ADD. Mostly because theres not a lot of relationship  or sexual experience. Meaning, he thinks there is more and better out there....... He's right, there is, but that's up to him to decide. And if he does, than you need to move on anyway.

In the end it really depends on the the person - men and women alike. If they feel the need to be free, it doesn't matter what you do. At this point in the relationship everyone should just end it. Do the mature thing and tell them you’ve lost it for them or don’t feel the same. Most of the time this doesn’t happen and you end up annoying each other, fights are rampant, and you hate each other by the end. Cheating would be obsolete if everyone told the truth about how they felt but we are all scared about hurting someones feelings.

 You can be the best girlfriend/boyfriend in the world, hottest guy/girl on the block, and a millionaire - If they want it to happen it's going to happen somehow. So when you are in your relationships don't sweat the little things, pick your battles, and be good to each other (try to ). Be the best partner you can be so if or when this does happen you can say you tried your best, but it didn't work. Beyond that  not much you can do, if someone doesn't have the feeling anymore - YOU CAN'T MAKE THEM.